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The Value/Meaning sheet is a tool that helps control your state and focus by framing your day.  The right perspective and point of view can turn a stressful situation into non stressful situation.  Cortisol is the stress hormone and makes it hard to lose weight, have energy and be healthy. We want to limit cortisol in our life as much as we can. We want our bodies making Testosterone/Estrogen not Cortisol/Insulin.  Your mental state controls your hormones. Much of the nonsense in our life is just what’s urgent, what we have to get done, not what’s important to us. It is very easy to get into a stress state when you are dealing with the laundry list of urgent things you need to get done.

Framing your day into the larger context of your life is a great way to keep it in its proper perspective, which makes it easier to stay in the right state.  It makes for a much more enjoyable productive day as well. Once we create the sheet we want to look at it every morning for a minute or two. Then we want to look at our schedule for the day, review what we have to get done and what we are going to eat for the day.  The whole process should take about 5 minutes. Making this part of your morning routine will make it easier to get things done and stay in the right state.

You need to create one page that distills down what you value, what’s meaningful, the experiences you want to have, how you want to be remembered, the things you want to do and learn before your time is up.  Appreciating or at least being aware of your mortality brings a certain perspective, a certain sense of urgency to use the time you have left in a more meaningful way. We get so busy being busy we can miss out on things that really matter to us.  Defining what is important to you and getting clear about it is really important. You want to think about and develop answers to these questions. This should take about an hour but could take much longer.

What are your values, what are the four or five core values that define you as a human being?  What values do you want to be remembered for living?

If you have never thought about this, just put some values down on paper and then write out what they mean to you and then think about the context of your life.  You will know which ones are for you and if you are not sure just give it some time. For me its loyalty, kindness, bravery, consistency, fun loving. These are the values I try to live my life by and here are their meanings to me.  Loyalty means being there for your people when they need you to be. Anyone can be a friend on a sunny day but who is there on a stormy day. Kindness means forgive, forget, give up your time, money and yourself to lift people up and help them, don’t be petty be kind.  Bravery doing what needs to be done, facing your challenges like a man and owning it. Stand up straight, shoulders back, let do this. Consistently I show up every day, I’m the same person and conduct myself like a gentlemen. Fun Loving, quick to smile, laugh and have a good time with it, life is short you might as well enjoy it.

When you are gone, what do you want your children and friends to say about you when they remember you?

I want my children to say about me, “My dad was awesome, he was a great dad, fun, caring, he lived life, he enjoyed it, he was always there for me when I needed him, he really believed in me and wanted me to be the best me I could be.  You would’ve liked him.”

What I want my friends to say about me.  “Good man, good friend, he was fun, we had a great run, I miss him.”

What experiences do you want to have before your time is up?  

Do you want to go to Machu Picchu?  Paris? Jump out of a plane? Buy your Dream Car or Home.  Start a business? Drive down the Pacific Coast Highway? Learn to play an instrument?  Write a book. What are the experiences that speak to your soul? Just list them out, maybe you never do them, that’s okay, but we do want to list at least ten things.

If you could only do one thing, or be one thing what would it be?

What is the most important one thing to you?  To me, if I could only do one thing with the rest of my life, it would be to be a good father.

Now let’s condense all this to a one easily reviewable sheet of paper.

Now on the top, we want to put  #1 Thing is mine and my loved one’s health. Then we put the one thing you would be, Next you Core values that you want to live your life by.

Then how you want to be remembered and finish with the experiences you want to have before your time is up

A sample of what a Value/Meaning Sheet could look like

#1 Thing is mine and my loved ones health

If I could only be one thing–it would be to be a good father

Core Values

 

Loyalty

Kindness

Bravery

Consistency

Fun loving

 

How I want to be remembered

I want my children to say about me, “My dad was awesome, he was a great dad, fun, caring, he lived life, he enjoyed it, but he was always there for me when I needed him, he really believed in me and wanted me to be the best me I could be.  You would’ve liked him.”

What I want my friends to say about me.  “Good man, good friend, he was fun, we had a great run, I miss him.”

Experiences I want to have before my time is up.

I want to watch my children grow up.

I want to travel to Machu Picchu, Prague, Moscow, Tokyo, Beijing, New Zealand, Yellowstone. Seattle, Alaska, Aruba, Australia and Bora Bora

I want to go to a Super Bowl, NBA Finals Game and see Billy Joel in Madison Garden

I want to publish at least 2 books.  One that I have already written and one I have not

I want to learn how to cook

I hope You find this as useful as I have, its definitely worth the investment in your time.

Thanks

Dr Steidinger

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